DAY 97

Today I am grateful for: a daily reminder

Today I had always planned on having an ungrateful day - why? because today is the one anniversary day that I don't look forward to. Today marks 6 years since my dad left us for heaven.

I had planned to justify this day as allowing me to list all the things that I am ungrateful for. I had planned to put some perspective on why being grateful is so important in light of my perceived hardships. I wanted to wallow in my misery for a while.

But something happened today that surprised me. I wasn't sad. My mind stayed focussed on today rather than drifting back to what was happening 6 years ago. I was able to remember the good times with my dad rather than the heartbreaking times. I didn't have to worry how my family was coping, because I knew they were okay too.

You may wonder about today's picture. It is my licence plate. The plates were my dad's and after he died they became mine. It is a welcome reminder to see them and remember him day by day. It makes me smile when I see cars passing me on the highway with the passenger staring at me to see who 'Fred' is, and their subsequent confusion when they notice 'Fred' is a girl.

I thank God that hearts do actually mend. That once broken they become stronger. That once damaged, become softer to the plight of others.

I am grateful for a friend who remembered what today was and emailed me to find out how I was going. Maybe that old adage about 'a trouble shared is a trouble halved', maybe that applies to sadness also. It would be nice if it did.

I guess this is the place I had hoped to be 6 years ago - the place when I can remember and smile, rather than being sad.

The world is empty without you dad, but we are doing okay.